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When the program enrollment has closed (usually mid- to late November), all participants will be sent a packet of information, including a homestay form which must be filled out and returned to the program staff coordinator. The forms will be sent on to our London homestay coordinator, Janet Dunlop, who will use them to make homestay arrangements. (She works with us and one or two other foreign study programs, and she has developed a pool of families with whom she has placed students in the past; new families usually come to her attention via recommendations from those already in the program.) You will be asked to write a paragraph about yourself which will be sent to your homestay family by way of introduction, and you will also be asked about specific needs and preferences you may have for your living situation.
Students in the past have sometimes come to grief by not taking enough care with the homestay form. The homestay administrator will make every effort to place you in a family that will be congenial for you, but for her to do that you must note those things that are most important to you, like a smoke-free household, a pet- or child-free household, whether you want or do not want a roommate (there are advantages either way), dietary restrictions and preferences—salt free, sugar free, vegetarian—whatever, just brief and clear. If you will be needing to make lots of trans-Atlantic phone calls, note that fact; if your bed needs to be of a certain size or sort, note it. It may not be possible to satisfy everyone on every point, but we can’t possibly do so if we don’t know what’s important to you. If you have a number of requirements, please prioritize them to the best of your ability.
You will get information on your homestay assignments some time in February, hopefully in time for the second orientation meeting, or shortly thereafter. We ask you to contact your homestay families and make arrangements for your arrival -- phoning directly is usually best (and not nearly as intimidating or expensive as you might think -- but be sure to remember the 8 hour time difference: when it is noon in Seattle, it is 8 p.m. in London; 1:00 a.m. in Seattle is 9:00 a.m. in London). While it is unlikely that your hosts will meet you at the plane, they will be happy to tell you just how to get to their house -- what Underground line and tube stop is closest and most convenient. Directions to the classroom site and schedules of your orientation sessions in London will be waiting for you at your homestays.
Homestays can be a rewarding part of your experience in London, but they also can be the source of some anxiety, especially before you leave. It is important to remember that life and customs, expectations and manners in England are not exactly the same as in the Pacific Northwest U.S. We have found that when there is difficulty between London Program students and their homestay families, some of the trouble can be traced to two sources:
Difficulty listening to, or taking in, whatever students are told before they go. More than once, someone has said, upon returning, “I know you said that, but I couldn’t realize then what you meant.” This is quite understandable—the whole business of going to and being in England is bound to seem unreal until you go—but we can hope that by putting matters as simply as possible, you’ll be able to do some intelligent anticipating.
Failure to consult our homestay coordinator, Janet Dunlop, soon enough when something is not right. Quite often something baffling becomes a point of irritation, and becomes then a source of tension. At this point, a call to Janet may be too late to help, especially when the student(s) may feel “If you do anything, I’ll get blamed and that will make things worse.” Indeed, if you find yourself feeling that way, it probably is too late for a change that could have been made sooner, perhaps easily.
Some homestay families are genuinely delighted to have foreign students live with them; others may not be. Regardless of their interests, all of them are being paid to provide a service. Whatever else they might be, homestays are basically business arrangements. Like all such arrangements, they work best when everyone involved is open and friendly and communicates clearly.
Students find their homestay families live in, and are used to, conditions that many students are not. Many/most students have never lived in a family setting except the one they grew up in, and are not currently living as a family at all; many students cheerfully live in apartments where the level of squalor is high, but are surprised to find even a lower level than that in “a family.” There may also be unexpected cultural gaps. The range of things involved here can be large, a matter of the family’s income, the size of the house, what is eaten or when it is eaten, what constitutes “enough” light or room or quiet or time, what people are open about or silent about; each person reports something different as being the surprise, or the hard thing to adjust to. So the word is: expect some jolts and jars, especially at the beginning.
At her London orientation get from Janet Dunlop a list of what she requires all homestay households to have in the way of furnishings, and to tell her immediately if there’s something you don’t have that you also really need or want. Remember that Janet is our agent, and she is eager to see that things are right, or can be made right.
There are some things it is best, and easiest, to be open about at the beginning, and the more you and your family can share about whos, whats, wheres, and whens right away, the more comfortable you’ll feel about mentioning it if trouble arises later and the easier it will be for Janet to address should that be necessary. Trouble points are precisely those involved in any shared living, but a list may help as a reminder: kitchens and bathrooms are the places where things most easily go wrong. Try to understand from the outset the family’s rules or preferences about use of the refrigerator, stove, kitchen equipment, bathroom sink—and this will include not just whats but whens; telephone use (see E below); laundry; noise levels at different times of day or night; early morning departures and late night returns; the newspaper, the television; last, far from least, the best times and ways to discuss whenever something has gone wrong. Encourage your homestay people to grumble about you as a matter of course, work to feel encouraged to do the same.
Telephones in England differ importantly in two ways from those in the U.S.: (1) the meter starts with every call, local or long distance (though, obviously, the greater the distance the faster the meter runs). This means you should not hang out on the phone, even if it’s to someone only a mile away, unless given express assurance that it’s OK; (2) long distance calls are not itemized on a bill, and it is very difficult to estimate at all well how much a UK to US call costs. This means you should encourage people from the US to call you, having first ascertained when are the best times for the caller and your homestay family. For your own long distance calls use an ATT Calling Card and USA Direct, which will be billed to your home number at about $1 a minute, or use one of the many internet calling shops in London. Calls to the US from these shops cost about 10 pence (17 cents) a minute.
Similarly, electricity in Europe (and most places in the US) is much more expensive than it is in the Pacific Northwest, so hold to a minimum your uses of anything electric that involves heat, like showers, hair and clothes dryers.
A generation ago English cooking was generally thought of, with some justice, as meat and vegetables cooked to death. A revolution in cooking has taken place since then. Most households serve palatable meals, and London’s shops and restaurants serve a variety of food ranging from greasy fish and chips or low-cal vegetarian meals to very expensive cuisine.
All this is said to alert you to problems that can arise and what to do when they do. Expect difference, expect difficulty, but you need not expect trouble. Partly because there are many homestay families, and each is different, and partly because this is where most of you will learn most about life in England, a good deal of talk about them is the norm. Each year somewhere between half to almost all the students report good experiences with their homestay people. Just as it is important to tell Janet when something seems wrong, be sure to tell her (and the homestay family, of course) when something is pleasantly or surprisingly right.
