Libcurl3, Libcurl4, Shibboleth, php-curl, & Ubuntu 18.04

For the two other people in the world who might run into this problem:

I’m trying to install NextCloud on a fresh Ubuntu 18.04 system, and I want to use the user_saml app and Shibboleth for user authentication. This means I need to use php7.1, first off, because 7.2 doesn’t have mcrypt support and user_saml requires it. I’d also like not to have to build everything from source. The problem I’ve run into is that php7.1-curl depends on libcurl4 and libapache2-mod-shib2 depends (through libxmltooling) on libcurl3, and you can only have one of those installed at a time.

I have found a workaround, and I’m documenting it here mainly so I don’t forget how it works, not because I expect anyone else will find it useful or interesting.
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