| Ever hold yourself to unrealistically high standards? Ever been unfairly critical of yourself as a grad student? Do you find yourself preoccupied with thoughts of perfectionism? If these questions ring true for you, below are some strategies that can support you in working through perfectionism, so you can be your whole (and best!) self. <3 |
Perfectionism can go hand in hand with feeling anxious. For example, you may be preoccupied with negative thoughts like, “There’s no way I’ll write a good final paper.” This kind of thinking can be exacerbated in academia, where it can appear as though everyone else has everything figured out. To manage this, try re-focusing your anxious thoughts and instead say to yourself, “I am working on this project one task at a time, and that is more than enough.” We know this is easier said than done, and yet just like with any wellness strategy, it will take consistent, regular practice.
Ever spend too much time over-thinking the same paragraph without going further on a draft? Sometimes it’s fear of failure that keeps us stuck in a rut. As with any project, a way to move past getting stuck in writing is to set realistic and manageable goals for yourself.
For example, rather than spending a lot of time on a single paragraph, try non-stop free writing for 15 minutes. While you are free writing, notice any perfectionistic feelings or thoughts but resist internalizing them. Take a five-minute break. Do another 15-minute round of writing. Afterwards, you might have at least two paragraphs (and one or two ideas) to add to your draft. Doing manageable rounds of writing can help you see that you are making progress.
The stakes feel high in graduate school, especially during times when feel like you are somehow “not smart enough.” In these situations, you may feel the pressure to constantly prove yourself. This is unrealistic and can negatively impact your wellbeing. While it’s important to be open to feedback and guidance from advisors and mentors to grow on intellectual and professional levels, it’s also important to practice radical acceptance to let go of the need to be perfect.
There are many things that happen in life that can throw us off our schedules. Accepting “this is good enough” means honestly knowing that you dedicated the time, effort, and resources to complete a project given everything you have to balance in life — and then it is time be done with the work. You tried your very best and that is ok!
Additional resources:
If you find that perfectionistic thinking is negatively impacting your wellbeing, consider reaching out for support. The HuskyHelpline provides all UW students with access to real-time, same-day, confidential mental health and crisis intervention support, 24/7, and in multiple languages. You can also contact your Bothell, Seattle, or Tacoma campus counseling center to schedule an appointment.
We hope these tips are helpful to you and let us know what has worked for you!
~UW Graduate Student Affairs
