With all the scripting, and the practice, you would think that The Bachelor would be better at saying no without hurting feelings.

Level: Middle / High School

Overview:

This lesson is designed to help participants explore alternative ways of communicating messages to their peers.

Objectives:

• To practice communicating one’s feelings in a difficult situation
• To explore alternative ways of communicating messages to peers

Time: 2 days

Preparation and Materials:

• Flip Chart and Markers
• Overhead: State a Fact or Feeling
• Handout: Skit Outline
• Overhead: Skit Critique

Procedures:

1. Begin by informing your students that a group of 1,000 girls were asked by a researcher what they wanted to learn in a sex education class. It was reported that 84% wanted to learn how to say no without hurting the other person’s feelings.

   All of us, men and women, need to learn how to express our feelings, and to be assertive when it comes to standing up for what we feel is right. Behaving responsibly is not only about treating others with care and respect, but also being true to ourselves.

2. Ask the group to share why they thought the girls in this study felt it was important to say no without hurting feelings when they were in a situation where they were feeling pressured to have sex. Ask group to identify some situations where this might occur. Record the situations on the Flip Chart.
3. Brainstorm with group reasons not to have sex. Record the reasons on the Flip Chart.
   
4. Ask group to discuss the overhead, State a Fact or Feeling.

Activity:

Have your students break into pairs. Students should work with a partner to write and present to the class a short skit illustrating a situation where they are required to clearly communicate their feelings and are able to do this without hurting the other person. Emphasize that prior to developing their script it is important to decide the audience who will be viewing their skit. You may wish to review the handout, Skit Outline. The following day, have students perform their skits for the class. After each performance, have members of the audience critique the work by responding to the questions on the Skit Critique overhead.