It’s 2:34am. Your listening session of Yeezus by Kanye West reaches its 5th or 6th cycle.
It’s 6am. Wake up. Pop Anti-Malarial Meds. Lie down.
It’s 6:30am, you should not have lain down. Commence nausea and gagging repeatedly over your toilet bowl.
It’s 4pm, mom and dad drive you to the airport and the pit of your stomach gurgles faster than a gigantic pot of chai on the stove.
It’s 6:30pm, take off. Thank you, Emirate Airlines, for the hot, lemony towels. Seattle to Dubai. Dubai to Bangalore. 21 hours.
Your mantra for this trip: “refuse to be afraid of the world. Be open, Be free, Be honest, Be Brave.”
Day 1: Insane, Loud, Fast, Spicy. Swollen feet, you have no control of tear ducts. Also, where’s the Wifi?
Day 2: Bucket showers, masala dosas, and rickshaws. Lost in translation. Rice with a side of rice. You’re not in Seattle anymore.
Day 5: Starbucks on Church Street. 400 rupees. Tourists, students, and the elite. Local coffee on the corner. 50 Rupees. Indians staring. Where do I fit in? Also, confusion about the whipped cream on an iced Americano.
Day 8: Pratibha Nandakumar: pioneer of Indian feminist writing. Akkai: Transwoman activist. Mr. Deepu: documentary filmmaker. The names you never hear, the people most will never meet. Changing their world, one day at a time.
Day 12: You carry your privilege on your blue shiny passport. You wear it with your fair skin that women on the street long to have. Children beg for money. You don’t give it. You don’t trust. Should you? Should you have to be a savior?
Day 14: Theatre of the Oppressed. The conflict in your life becomes an interactive game. You realize your struggles aren’t just yours. Wherever you are, struggle is universal. Whose job is it to solve these problems? Who are you to think you can?
Day 20: Jainist temples. 614 granite steps. 438 feet off the ground. Views where you can see into infinity. Hand carved, delicate and fragile. There is art in everything, yet this art is falling apart.
Day 21: Katak traditional dance, Thumri music, Janapadaloka Folk Art Museum. A specially dedicated procession of villagers performing traditional folk dance. Honored and lucky? Privileged and spoiled? Humbled and Grateful.
Day 31: Your heart hurts. You are sick and tired of being sick and tired. Exhaustion is an understatement. Study abroad can be like an international frat party if you want it to be. It can also be an intense journey of being critical, of questioning everything, and learning to navigate your power, your privilege, your attitude, and how you shine your light on the world. Study abroad sucks because, quite frankly, it could tear your heart out. So do it, because your heart will never be the same, and you will be thankful for it.
Stefanie Gonzales is a 2016 graduating student in Community, Environment & Planning, with a minor in Gender, Women and Sexuality Studies. She studied abroad in Bangalore, India in the summer of 2015.
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